Pregnancy sucks

Seriously, why do all these chicks go on and on about what a wonderful and glorious experience pregnancy is?! Are they mentally insane?! Don't get me wrong, the "magic" of pregnancy is not lost on me. I'm happy to do it because I want the end result, but to actually ENJOY it?! HA! The last nine months have physically sucked, and anyone that would say differently has a few screws loose. The weird thing is, as far as I can tell I've had it pretty easy. I frequent an online due date club full of other women that are also due in October, so I see what many of these women go through. In the first trimester many of these women had morning sickness so bad that they couldn't even function. I can't even imagine! During the second trimester many of these women gained an insane amount of weight, which, for the most part, was probably their own doing - but still... They now suffer from horrible backaches and other pains because they've gained 50+ pounds before they even hit the third trimester and their poor bodies are giving out on them. A lot of them had constipation, got stretch marks galore, headaches, swelling, you name it! Not me, I've kept myself in pretty good shape. I attribute a lot of this to staying active and eating well most of the time (hey, I'm still pregnant and had my moments. lol.). Now here I am in the third trimester with three weeks left to go and finally it has all started to come undone. I haven't been able to exercise in ages, I just... CAN'T! A flight of stairs is enough to make me break down in tears right now (yet I still lug myself up and down several times a day at work because I'm stubborn and hate being that chick taking the elevator up one floor, lol). I'm to the point where very little makes me feel happy - and I don't say that in an "I'm depressed" kind of way. It's not like that at all. I'm still mentally stable, I just don't get joy from the little things like I used to. Basically the only two things that make me feel good are food and having my hair rubbed. Yet the whole food thing just pisses me off because, dangit, I just want to stuff my face with everything I shouldn't eat but I CAN'T because if I do I will end up gaining a ton of weight that I'll just have to lose after the baby is here, so I have to restrict myself... But I've definitely gotten more lax lately with it. Work pretty much blows and when I get home all I want to do is lay down on the couch with my head on Jer's lap so he can rub his fingers through my hair. But now I feel bad because his poor fingers are hurting him and I know it's because of me. I am never comfortable unless I am lying on my side, and even then it's hit-or-miss depending on how the baby is positioned... Sometimes at night if I fall asleep on one side for too long I literally can't move when I do wake up and it takes me about 378589372389 tries to get out of bed, which is really fun when you have to pee so bad you're on the verge of peeing your pants! Still, for as craptastic as I feel right now I see these other women suffering so so so much more than I am in my online due date club. Many of them have been put on bed rest, whether by their doctor or by self-diagnosis... Many have started throwing up again or started getting stretch marks (if they hadn't already) and all sorts of other stuff. I won't lie, this makes me feel better. I know that makes me sound rather evil, but it does. At least I am still a functioning preggo. lol. Until about 2-3 p.m. I am actually totally fine. I can walk, talk, sing, skip, dance, and do whatever just fine. I'm at work right now (obviously working) and I feel just dandy. Not a complication or care in the world. But everyday around mid-afternoon my body just gives up. Seriously, it's like this instant transformation! I've had enough and need to lie down, but there's still 1 1/2-2 1/2 hours of work left, so I have to make myself sit here uncomfortably, which makes me a real joy to be around come 4:30. Poor Jer only gets to see me when I'm at my worst anymore. I'm not saying there aren't any good parts to pregnancy, even now, because there are - all I'm trying to say is that for those people that say to me what a wonderful thing it is, well, I just want to punch you in the face.

The one good thing about pregnancy is feeling and seeing the baby move. That's something I wouldn't trade for the world. That said, sometimes it can be downright creepy! Now that the baby is term and pretty big in there sometimes I can feel little hands and feet rubbing around in there and even grabbing at me. It is the most bizarre and f@*ked up feeling ever! I won't lie, I don't like it. It totally freaks me out! Yesterday I could feel a hand like practically clawing at me and I just wanted to scream! Not cool. You instantly think this:



*shudder*

So there you have it. Pregnancy sucks. But it's worth it. (c:

Alright, in other news I had my weekly checkup yesterday. I saw Dr. Waters and he was the last doctor I had to meet at the practice, so next week I FINALLY get to see my own doctor again! Dr. Waters was nice, but by far my least favorite doctor in the practice. The funny thing is, he is only one of TWO doctors that actually took the time to look over my chart and know who the heck I am before coming into our appointment. I appreciate that, so I'd feel physically safe having him deliver the baby should my doctor not be available... But there was just something about him I didn't especially care for, I can't really place it. Maybe it was because he was really late and I hate waiting. lol. Anyway, baby and mommy are still doing well. Baby is measuring right on and had a heartbeat of 140, which seems to be the norm for her lately. She is most definitely head down (woo!) and everything else looks good.

My next appointment is next Tuesday with MY doctor, Dr. Reeves.

As for now, well, I am term tomorrow - 37 weeks. That means that if I were to go into labor now, they wouldn't do anything to try and stop it. The baby would be perfectly healthy and ready to go in the real world! You have no idea what a relief it is to make it to this point. No more worrying about pre-term labor for me! Now I get to focus on the opposite - how to get this baby outta here! lol. I'm not sure why, but I really don't feel like I'll make it to my due date. I think I'll go somewhere between 38-39 weeks (Sept 25-Oct 2). We'll see if I'm right! For now the plan is to eat lots of pineapple and eggplant, which are supposedly good at "ripening" the cervix or something. There's probably little truth bethind that, but I love both foods so I figure what the heck! You never know...